We all know that members of the Duke lacrosse team gang-raped a single-mom working to put food on the table.

We all know that Duke lacrosse captain David Evans has a fake mustache that he ceremonially wears whenever he rapes a stripper. We all know that if your own DNA is found in your own trashcan in your own house alongside a fake fingernail belonging to a stripper, it's conclusive proof that you're a rapist. We all know that running from the police after throwing a loud and raucous party with underage drinking isn't the normal response of a college student. We all know that it means that you're a rapist. We all know that Evans demanding, and passing, a polygraph test means nothing. We all know that the victim's "ninety-percent sure" identification of Evans as a rapist passes the "reasonable doubt" test.

We all know that calling 6' 3'', 195-pound Colin Finnerty the "little skinny one" is an accurate description. We all know Reade Seligmann has the ability to make eight phone calls, ride in a taxi, withdraw money from an ATM, order and eat take out, and sign into his dorm at the same time that he raped a stripper.

We all know that the taxi driver lied to give Seligmann an alibi. We all know that the taxi driver's computer record is a forgery, as is Seligmann's ATM receipt. We all know that the ATM surveillance picture of Seligmann is trick photography. We all know that his cell phone records are fakes. We all know that the witnesses who place him away from the party are all liars, and probably hate black people, as well as women, and especially black women.

We all know that the voluntary handover of DNA samples from every white member of the Duke lacrosse team was really a public relations stunt. We all know that the racist police in Durham removed the real DNA evidence in order to exonerate the white lacrosse players, just as we know that the racist police in LA planted the fake evidence in order to frame the black football player.

We all know that the pictures showing the Duke rape accuser in a disheveled and bruised state upon arriving at the lacrosse party are doctored. We all know that initially claiming to be the victim of twenty rapists, and then remembering it was only three, is quite normal in such cases. We all know that the word of one accuser beats the word of dozens of other witnesses. We all know that it's really easy for dozens of college-aged men to keep a secret and really hard for the police to get just one of them to crack and admit the truth.

We all know that the employees of escort agencies aren't prostitutes, especially ones who work for an outfit called Bunnyhole Entertainment. We all know that someone who is a convicted car thief and works as an escort isn't capable of lying. We all know that a woman who made one groundless rape accusation would never make another. We all know that someone on parole has no reason to concoct a fantastic rape allegation to avoid arrest for public intoxication.

We all know that Wendy Murphy, Nancy Grace, and district attorney Mike Nifong all have open minds about this case. We all know that the defenders of the Duke players are rich, white, and male. We all know that if being rich, white, and male aren't crimes yet, they should be.

We all know that the arrest of the taxi driver on a three-year-old case, where he helped store security identify a shoplifter he had driven home, is totally unrelated to the Duke rape investigation and bears no resemblance to witness intimidation. We all know that the arrest of the second stripper, Kim Roberts, on a probation violation, and his subsequent lessening of a penalty against Roberts, has nothing to do with Roberts change-of-opinion from disbelieving the accuser's story to now believing it possible. We all know that offering the accuser a photographic line-up composed exclusively of Duke lacrosse players didn't rig the process.

We all know that the people most convinced of the players' guilt would also be the most bothered by a fallacious rape claim, just as they were in the Tawana Brawley case. We all know that the Duke lacrosse players deserve neither their $800 nor their reputations back.

We also know that any white man who was at the party is automatically guilty. It's akin to being guilty of bank robbery if you were at the bank on the same day it was robbed.

We all know that THE WHITE MAN IS GUILTY. Full stop.

Remember The Chappelle show episode where Dave was on the witness stand in court and he was describing all the different steps it would take to convince him that R. Kelly is guilty? Now imagine that in the place of R. Kelly there's the Duke Lacrosse team. That is what it's going to take to convince a jury in Durham of their innocence.

I deleted the second half of the title, "(or, 'I Believe' Part II)," because I think the reference might be too obscure for readers. When I started writing this piece, I kept thinking: this reminds me of something. Then the late Michael Kelly's classic piece, "I Believe," came into mind. That was it. Here's the link to that piece:
http://www.usactuary.com/I_Believe.html

Wow, when you put it that way...

Well, the NYT has made the case front-page story and has written scores of articles on it so the accusation must be true. I mean, they wouldn't take inordinate satisfaction in pushing the malevolent prosecution of clearly innocent white rich kids would they?

(Note, that the NYT RARELY reports extensively on local crimes at all).

Being at a college campus and not being part of the "correct" class,gender,or race makes you guilty of every crime committed in the history of mankind. Wendy Murphy is a complete disgrace to the legal profession.

I suppose because these guys are white it's ok to call them racists even though the woman's claims are extremely questionable and if a crime was committed, it had little to do with the fact that the woman was black.

But, that didn't stop a Black Panther from yelling that justice will be served 'racist' at one of the defendants. Obviously, in minds of some blacks, not only are these guys guilty of the crime but are automatically rascists.

This is the state of things in America these days.

There's a chance some of them said the "N" word, and that one guy called someone a fag. According to the NY Times, this is just as bad as rape, so its good they created all this hysteria.

Oh by the way, four black basketball players just gang raped a non stripping, white University of Richmond student. For some reason, the NY times hasn't taken this up.

Rosco, You better get those Duke boys. - Nifong.

Dan, You're the Man!